I tell folks all the time that I don't like people. But it's not completely true. I actually really love, care and am compassionate about people. I enjoy good people and good conversation. The catch? It's specific to those in my inner circle and those I meet/interact with day-to-day who I can discern their sincere intentions towards me. So I engage with different people often and regularly, and have the ability to build relationships easily.
I say all this to say that I actually come across as outgoing and extroverted. I'm far from both. What I'm realizing that I am is socially introverted. And yes, I know that sounds all kinds of wrong. But follow me for a second.
I get excited about meeting up with a group of friends for a super bowl party, but I'll probably bring a book along too. True story.
I can go out to dinner and trivia with my coworkers and have a blast, but I'll need to counteract that with plenty of down time for days after. Especially since I see them throughout the day.
I have great conversations with people throughout the day, but I'm observing and reading them as we continue to interact time after time. Over time I start to feed into that person's needs unconsciously. I don't do this on purpose and I'm sure it sounds odd but it's something I've noticed about myself and what makes me likable to others. Again, it's not intentional.
I don't mind being surrounded by people so long as the attention isn't on me.
I'm usually an open book and pretty talkative once someone else has broken the ice, and as I said before, I can discern their intentions and sincerity.
Is what I'm saying clear as mud now?! I'm pretty sociable is what I'm getting at, and if I'm at an event where we're meeting for the first time you won't recognize that I'm an introvert unless I tell you. This just happened to me at an event I went to with the hubs. The parents of the team he coaches threw all the coaches in the organization an end of season cookout. I was excited to go and ended up being separated from the hubs the entire time to hang out with woman I'd never formally met before. I had a great time! Introversion came up while we were talking and, as usual, I got the "I never would have guessed that" line. FYI, I'd brought a book to the event too. Because introvert.
So yeah, I really do like most people. I just need time to re energize after too much engagement, intense interactions, lengthy conversations, etc. You can bet your bottom dollar that I crave time to myself to refill because everything I've mentioned above drains every bit of energy out of me. Books calm me. And going out alone for a drive, dinner, a bookstore or movie excites me. It's completely uplifting to me, y'all!
You get it now:
Social. + Introvert. = Me.
What are the ways in which you're describing yourself as you age, grow and learn the true nature of your ways?!